FUNERAL ETIQUETTE - WHAT'S EXPECTED?
WHAT SHOULD I WEAR?It's important to remember the reason you're attending the funeral or cremation...To lend support and pay your respects to the family in mourning.When it comes to funeral dress , funeral etiquette is very important. The traditional color for funeral dress is black, although it's not necessary, if you stick to dark colors you'll be fine. If you're squeezed for time and dropping in during working hours, even if you're wearing a uniform, the family will be pleased you took time from your busy schedule to attend. SHOULD I BRING THE CHILDREN?Attending a funeral or cremation service is never a comfortable situation, this is when funeral etiquette comes in handy.However, when it comes to children, it's important for parents to know that death is completely natural and is a part of the cycle of life. If you're attending a service for a close family member, if possible, make arrangements to see the body before the burial or cremation occurs. This experience will be a positive one for your child. It's important to note that viewing the body should not be forced and it can provide an opportunity for your child to "goodbye" to your beloved family member. If the child doesn't participate, it leaves many unanswered questions that in some cases can haunt the child for many years. Remember, nobody wants to die but not talking about it in an open and comfortable way certainly does't make the situation disappear. WHAT SHOULD I SAY?Remember the reason you're attending the funeral or cremation...to pay your respects and support the family in mourning.What is appropriate for funeral etiqueet, saying something like: "My deepest sympathies" or "My condolences" with a warm sincere hug can go a long way. Use common sense, avoid the 20-questions syndrome and commenting on the way the deceased doesn't look they way they did in real life is a definate no-no. A service is definitely not the place to add fuel to the fire especially in the case of family feuds. Avoid starting arguments at all cost, emotions are already at their peak after a beloved family member passes on. HOW LONG SHOULD I STAY?There really is nothing written in stone when it comes to funeral etiquette when facing this kind of situation.A general rule of thumb is, pay your respects express your condolences to the family without monopolizing the next of kin's time. Talk to a few people and move on, especially if there is a big crowd present. WHAT'S BETTER, SENDING FLOWERS OR GIVING MONEY?Unless otherwise specified, sending flowers is fine. Some families, usually by request, prefer monetary donations or a donation made to a charity of their choice.The funeral home usually provides envelopes to facilitate things and the amount is not important. Guests can also buy masses at the local church when the donor can dedicate the person whom the mass is given for.
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